Leave No Child Behind, End The Mischief Of Child Favoritism

 By Constance Ndeleko

It’s not all about the vulnerability that we give to our children but they deserve more than our attention in this world. Being such blessings in our lives we’ve to purpose to take the initiative of ensuring that they live a comfortable life filled with love and care. they need to feel they belong to a society that believes, understand and welcomes them despite of life situations.


Imagine every child having that big boom smile in their faces every day because someone somewhere ensured that they lived a worthy and comfortable life. Don’t you think that is amazing?


We are in a free world where democracy tends to have its way through why can’t we do the same to the children? I believe every child has a right to equality, education and good health. For decades in Kenya we’ve been fighting to have free education and in the long run we’re still fighting to ensure we’ve good health care system where every child can live a life without worries of; where will we get the money to fund my hospital bills when am sick?


But it is still astonishing and a bit crazy to find out that parents still carry on with irresistible perception of favoritism to some of the kids and making others feel inferior thus experiencing unequal tender love. I tend to believe this is a shameful act which should be stopped with immediate effect and no child whatsoever should undergo this kind of torment


Life is too short and Yes we’ve seen it in the past but we should let go of the mischief of favoritism without a second thought. Each child deserves equal attention, love, care, good health and understanding regardless of the position each take in the family.


Children perceive parental favoritism because parents prefer the older or the baby of the family than others leaving them depressed and with this perception of unequal treatment which ends up bringing a damaging effect to the children.


Well it is hard for most parents to accept the fact that they tend to love or give more attention to some of the kids in the family perhaps because they are named after their parents or their side of their family thus probing them to have a different or special attention to those kids.


Parental favoritism has brought many different implications on the less favored child whereby they tend to develop ill will towards their parents and resentment towards the favored sibling, causing rivalry between them thus enhancing hatred, no reliable friendship and relationship.


Well while I was walking in the street last week I encountered children joyfully playing on the ground but to my surprise one of them caught my attention and I just walked straight towards her. My question was why are you not playing with the others on the ground?


She responded, ‘Well they all hate me because I have cool stuff’, and suddenly I saw a frown on her face and tears stated trickling down her cheeks. I knew some of the kids and I called out aloud asking them why they had sidelined her from the game.


They all sneered which took me by surprise and it made me more inquisitive. I didn’t expect the most of the response I got.one of the little girls came forward saying ‘my mother buys her cool stuff, takes her with them to the mall and functions and I am always left at home to read or do homework, I am not given their phone to play with because am older, neither do they allow me to watch TV so I mostly end up outside to play with my friends who love me so much and I get to do cool stuff with.


Then I asked the other girl if that was true she easily responded ‘because I am eight and I am the last born and she hates me because I tend to be given everything I ask for’. Well we all know most of us have grown up to family set up with these kind of special treatment and we ended up not liking the one who enjoyed it.


Can you imagine how you feel right now that if someone could have spoken upfront to your parents about favoritism how your life could have been more amazing right now knowing that equality ruled the house instead of favoritism.


As said it is not easy and it might be even be a bit strenuous for a parent to be scrupulous to each and every child in the family but everyone should try to their best to ensure every child receives equal treatment despite their positions in the family, grades, health conditions or their physical features.


We need to show these children are equal no matter the circumstances at hand be it a golden child or the ones that are called “black sheep “, none should feel superior than the other ,they are all ours.


The astonishing fact is that it has brought about cool detachment, warm glow of love, approval for the one child and leaving others feeling neglected causing tension, anxiety attacks, low self-esteem, depression and long-term damage whereby some still deal with these issues even as they are adults.


We can end this by ensuring good communication to our children, through talks, encouragements and level of understanding on their abilities. It is true that we don’t have equal gift or talents but we can always compromise with the fact that we are a team in this world.


I know this is not something new that you might be reading on but this is one of the many significant lessons that we should always keep up with as a society to ensure that we give the best to each child for them to live a fulfilled life even though one cannot have everything in the world but let us make it seem so.


Let’s hold ourselves in higher regards on how people treat us and how we treat each child in the family.


Photo://Courtsey UNICEF_Fouchard

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